It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
