I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
