"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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