i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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