he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
