You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
