ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
