worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...