It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
