So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
