Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
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