How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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