I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize