omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
