Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
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