He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
