So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
