When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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