Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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