Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize