Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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