Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
