I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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