Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
