Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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