sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
