Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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