Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
