No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
