More tranny stories later!
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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