He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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