I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
