Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
