also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
im holly from the hills drunk
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
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