OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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