I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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