don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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