Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Randomize
