Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
