dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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