he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
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thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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