They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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