similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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