oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
