so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
