Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I have already put on my inside pants.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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