i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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