I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
