Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
