i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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