At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
