Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
